I was the tender age of 25 when I decided I hated the pope. However, I hear a cry from the readers we need some sort of age context. Was it the old pope or the new one, or maybe even a pope from yesteryear? Is it a slight on the Nazi upbringing of the current pope, or the condom hating aids inciting pope that ran before? Or are you just making a crude slight on not really the pope at all, but the Catholic Church and their figure heads? And I answer defiantly no, to both those. I am 27 and so my hate covers both popes. I would never judge two obviously different individuals with the same brush because they can be pigeon holed in the same social group. (For example hating gays and menstruating women just because of a comment in some book…Yum! Tasty religious satire*.) However, I would not pretend to be intellectual and profound enough to attack catholism on ideological and rational grounds in written word. It has been done superbly by individuals that have a much superior intellect and written skill.
Now I hear you scream, ‘what then?’ Is it simply because he wears a silly hat? A silly big hat, Thomas? Does that derive hatred from you? Just because he has a long pointy hat, that is different from the norm? Is that the ridiculous reason why you hate them? Well…… actually that is right. How perceptive of you.
Siamese popes; joined by the anus.
Ok, I feel I may have lost you, but in the words of an inept lecturer ‘bear with me’. It is not as simple as it may seem. In my experience there are only two reasons to wear a hat. The first is functionality (stay with me), an army hat is used for protection, a police hat is used so pregnant women can be sick in it (a real English law), a homeless man’s tin foil hat is to protect him from aliens stealing his thoughts and I wear a fisherman’s hat to repel the constant rush of apathy that plagues my entire existence. The pope’s hat has no such functionality. You may argue that it shows us who he is. However, I feel the white robes, the novelty effigy merchandise of him and his constant patting of heads indefinitely gives him away. So what is the other reason?
It unfortunately is a much more sinister reason. Stanley Milgrim in 1974, conducted a psychology experiment. The experiment indicated that 65% of the participants were willing to give a deadly electric shock to a stranger, when an authority figure was present. However, when an authority figure was not present, few participants went the full distance. Another experiment shown on the link below** shows that people will behave in often morally and un-socially acceptable ways because a man in uniform, a man in authority told them to. Authority is obviously a very powerful tool, and that tool can be misused.
Pope sporting his summer hat.
No one needs to be told about the effects of authority on the masses in 1940’s Germany
There is also an internal authority within institutions, and this is where the power of the hats comes in. This can be seen in the army as often their hats can show rank and power. Hats show authority within authority, and reflect greater power to the public. I would argue that uniform is the most important precursor for the effective use of authority, and hats are the most powerful and significant part of this uniform. This may have not been the case many years ago, but now it is inherent in our culture to obey uniformed people. Catholic ministers make statements all the time that are ridiculed and forgotten but it seems that the pope is exempt from this. When he speaks the world listens, even those who like me -if you hadn’t guessed-do not believe in organized religion. Why?, because he represents the church, he represents religions views(it could be said that many non-believers listen to the pope as the voice of organised religion regardless that is indefinitely opposed to many streams), he portrays himself as an authority above all authorities. He gets away with this, (please note deliberate use of he) because of his hat. His hat grants him the power, that I do not think he deserves or uses appropriately.
Pope states that wearing glasses promotes Aids/HIV and offers an alternative
Many may think I’ve cobbled together some weak arguments to make quite a pointless point, you probably are right.
However, my blog is called Vacuous opinions.
And, we can all surely agree that the pope’s hat is stupendously ridiculous.
*I realise that some observant fans of Charlie Brooker will realise that this is very much-if poorly construed- the way he would comment about satire. In fact is this whole thing a poor attempt at his type of work. Sadly yes, but I’m a new and lost writer. Who needs to derive (often fraudulent) inspiration from other writers.
